Sunday, June 12, 2016

Different Life

So I got bored the other day at work and read this whole blog start to finish and from where I stand today it's like reading about someone else's life... It's like a bad dream... I can't figure out how I lived like that all these years... I can't figure out how I survived all that... 

I never want to go back to feeling like that.

I can't lie I miss Josh... But not the Josh I talk about in this blog, the Josh I married... I miss the way his eyes would light up when he laughed, I miss his jokes, I miss his smile, I miss the smell of his skin, I miss the way he'd sip juice boxes and the way he'd make me laugh til I peed myself... I miss the man I thought I'd spend the rest of my life with...

I love my fiancé and I truly am happy with him but that doesn't stop the hurt I feel...